Thoughts on Parsha Vayeshev

Yaakov Avinu observed his parents marriage and their chinuch and he used this with his own children. Yaakov saw that he and his brother where not loved equally by both of their parents. He saw his parents not communicating and took this into his own neshomah. He loved his children, but he loved Yosef the most, Because Yaakov loved Yosef more than his other children the brothers became jealous of him, and did not want to listen to him. They where so sure they where right that they judged him worthy of death, and caused their father untold grief for 22 years.  We learn that Yaakov sat Shiva for Yosef, but he refused to be comforted. Yaakov Avinu said I have to sit shiva but I will not be comforted because I do not have a body and I refuse to give up on him. This kept Yosef strong because he had someone who believed in him.

What do we learn from this, treat your children equally and communicate with them openly and honestly. This does not mean that they each should receive the same education, because we learn form Yitzchak that you cannot raise two children exactly the same. This does not mean that you should not love them equally and treat them equally.  By communicating with your children and raising them in the way that suits them best. You do not have to love their actions, but you have to love them. As long as you do not give up on your children and you believe in them, then no matter how far away they have strayed from the right path they can come back as long as you love them and believe in them.

Don’t give up, even if there is no one physically alive who cares about you, Hashem has not given up on you. So do not give up!

Taken form Rabbi Zecharia Wallersteins Vayeshev shiur on


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